I just couldn’t get it in
couldn’t get it in all the way
there was no music no sound
it wasn’t in all the way
and then I pushed it in harder
I pushed it in with great force
and there was music
and there was sound
there were songs I never heard before
and there were songs I had heard before
but it was music
I needed the music
I needed to hear sound
I needed to hear musical sounds
to drown out the tree of poison
growing in my head
the burgeoning tree of three poisons
glowing inside my head
Oh, the beauty!
Oh, the many-colored leaves!
Oh, the pain!
Messages popping
in and out
streaming in and out
no warning
no discussion
no thought
but secret thoughts
keeping secret thoughts from myself
from that other self
the one that thinks it knows everything
secret thoughts getting in
Couldn’t let them in
pushed hard to keep them out
didn’t want to hear the music
didn’t want to hear sound
no one around
so I began to sing
like a tree
like a tree in a beautiful garden
in the beautiful sunlight
I began to sing